white—king:

xiiirox:

“It’s like plaid and tortoise shell glasses, dude. They don’t have anything to do with hipsters, and yet the hipsters just fucking overtake things. It doesn’t help that you wear fuckin’ white boots either, dude. You’re like the love child of hipster and asshole.”

/shifts to hang upside-down, folding his arms behind his head.

Actually I’m the love child of a brilliant, mad philosopher and an old witch. Are those qualities of a hipster as well? Tell me more. 

“Uh, not quite. I think you have to be the love child of a middle class stoner and a pretentious cock sucker to be full blooded hipster. 

“Wait, is your mom seriously a witch? If you get angry enough with me, are you going to get her to hex me?”